August 27, 2014
Thanks to the OAP friends who answered the Survey on Life Lessons on Living Awesomely in Your 40's! Here are the results...
Thank you for sharing your wisdom on how to be more effective and live an awesome life in your 40's. I loved all your answers.
I analyzed and categorized my favorite pieces of advice into 10 insights, to serve as inspiration and to kick off the next decade of my life. I hope you learn from them as much as I did...
1. Connect, Reconnect, and Disconnect
Connect with the people that matter most and guide the young generation. This is also a great time to reconnect with old friends and rekindle the relationships. I completely agree that it's time to disconnect with negative people and not waste time with emotional vampires.
“Connect, reconnect, and disconnect. Connect with young people. You just might be surprised at what you can learn from them. Reconnect with old friends. Reminisce the good old days. Disconnect with negative people. Life is too short. Keep it beautiful.” - Deng
“By the time you are in your forties, if you are a normal human being, you are already carrying with you a lot of excess baggage. We need to find a way to let all the toxicity out of our lives and edit what we decide to keep that nurtures and uplifts us..... From emotions (anger & unforgiveness), habits (too much alcohol, smoking, sugar), people (heavy & negative friends & family) and jobs (work we are doing that doesn't bring us fulfillment).” - Tina Vitas, almost 47 but not until 2017
“Go for positive life struggle.” - digitalsteer (Himno Jose Rizal lyrics writer)
“Be more choosy on how you spend your time or who would you spend your time with regardless if its just a minute or an hour. Choose what truly matters the most.” - Anonymous
“It's the age where you have experienced a lot of things in life. This is the stage where you still work very hard but at the same time learning how to sit back and be a mentor the people who are younger than you. At this age, you have to start to count your blessings and learn how to share it to the people around you.” - Bububip
“There are only 3 constants in life...Change, Principles, and Choice.” - Stephen Covey
“To be effective in my 40s, I just follow these 3 steps: 1. Take out negativity in my life. 2. Don't sweat the small stuff. 3. Always pray and thank the Lord for every blessing.” - Rima
“I could have chosen a KPO company which values more on their people and their quality of life than staying in a BPO company which was good in making billboards and ads about how good they are. For OFWs, people on their late 30's, 40's and even 50's, we do have KPO companies who value their people and their quality of life. If only I have found out sooner, I could have spent more time with my family, focused and improved on my writing and on fitness, learned how to be financially stable, thereby having a life outside of the office. I could have learned how to swim years ago, enjoyed the outdoors, perhaps even travel. Now that I am more focused on what matters, I know I will be able to achieve it.” - Sarah Bucu of http://healthbuffmomofseven.blogspot.com
“God speaks in the events of your life. Know your purpose. One's purpose is neither necessarily singular nor constant. Connect with and learn from both the young and the old. That will broaden the range of your relevance.” - Ramon M
2. Postpone Nothing!
This will be the mantra of my 40's. It's time to tie the loose ends on the dreams you forgot to pursue in your 30's. I've always wanted to create a social enterprise to teach the next generation of young Filipinos on internet marketing and how to leverage the internet as the great equalizer in life.
“I postponed and deferred a lot of things because I was busy taking care of the kids, but I have no regrets at all. Family is my number 1 priority. It's too bad that women always seem to do the delayed gratification thing, but that's okay. I just recently retired and now my motto is 'postpone nothing.'
I’ve always wanted to write a book about my grandfather. I should have started in my 40's because now (I just turned 60), there are very few people alive who can give me material for this book.” - Flipped in Florida
“That its never too late to do things you want to do....right now, I'm thinking of going back to school to take Masterals either in Communication Arts or in Education and I want to teach. That was my dream during my thirties, but I got derailed when our house caught fire and I had young kids to take care of. I lost my focus then. Now, I'm ready to reach for that dream again. Wish me luck.” - Rima
“The time is now. Ask question, they won't bite.” - Anonymous
“Learn new tricks and find new adventures continuously.” - digitalsteer (Himno Jose Rizal lyrics writer)
“Am a pretty good swimmer so I would say, I regret not learning how to scuba dive. But hey, it's never too late :)” - Chet Quimson-Cabigas
"And don’t worry about losing. If it is right, it happens—The main thing is not to hurry. Nothing good gets away." – John Steinbeck
“I never loved enough and didn't take much risk in going into business.” - Jun Tamor
"It is never too late to achieve the dreams you thought you once missed.” - Sarah Bucu of http://healthbuffmomofseven.blogspot.com
3. Be Active, Eat Healthy, and Meditate
They say men age well and look better in their 40's. Expect a more active and healthy OAP in the next 10 years. I also need to start learning how to meditate and to manage the stress in my life better.
“Time to eat more vegetables and fruits. Incorporate exercise in your daily regimen. Do not get stressed by small things.” - Jun Tamor
“Regularly engage in a physical activity that you enjoy consistently Eat healthy food most of the week and allot one day for a cheat eat.” - Chet Quimson-Cabigas
“Never stop being physically and mentally active.” - Bubupip
“That life is short and we all have to care of our health, consciously if we want to stay longer for our love ones and if we still want to achieve the dreams we thought we had missed.
I am still on my 40's but just four years away from my golden years. I have worked in the call center industry for more than 8 years and had lost a lot of sleep not mention its accompanying health issues like ulcer to name a few. I have skipped a number of meals and delayed going to the bathroom so I could catch on sleep which was not healthy. I am trying to curb those habits one by one. I had been on active lifestyle since 2012, refrain from eating food high in cholesterol and try to eat regular meals on time as much as possible. I also run weekly, does Zumba and currently practice Yoga. I also had been blogging for more than two years which had become a creative outlet. These are the things that I can see myself doing for the rest of my life.” - Sarah Bucu of http://healthbuffmomofseven.blogspot.com
“Start your day in meditation.” - Anonymous
4. The 40’s State of Mind
What's the big deal with the big 4-0 anyway? It's just a number. Sure, it may officially signal the start of your mid-life crisis, but it's also the start of relating better with the older generation and of learning to stop dwelling on how young you once were. It's the time when you seriously start thinking of the legacy you will leave behind.
“40's is just a number but youthfulness is a state of mind. I still considered my 40's as a party and gimmick times.” - Jun Tamor
“Age is just a number. You are only as old as how you feel and think you are.” - Chet Quimson-Cabigas
"It all starts in your brain." - Eifelica
“In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.” - Robert Frost
“Being in the 40s is just a number because your mind and your heart will always be young.” - Bububip
“That age is just a number. It cannot stop you from achieving your goal.” - Anonymous
5. Believe in Yourself but be Humble
I believe that it's time for the Filipino to conquer the world and excel in all the creative fields. It's the Filipino's time to shine internationally and for the rest of the world to discover our awesome nation.
“Turning 40 seemed to me to be the crossroads...if you haven't accomplished what you started in your late 20's now is the time to take more risks and do epic shit.” - Flipped in Florida
“Believe in yourself - that's my favorite quotation.” - Rima
“Believe in what people around me say things about things. I should have believed in myself first.” - digitalsteer (Himno Jose Rizal lyrics writer)
“It's ok to accept help from others. Don't try to be the 'perfect mom' no one is anyway.” - Anonymous
“Live one day at a time and count your blessings.” - Anonymous
“I have everything that I need to make me happy.” - "HAPPY" by Square Heads
“Exercise confidence but be more humble.” - Anonymous
“Live one day at a time. Stop worrying about the future. Have faith in God. Enjoy life, no matter what.” - Eifelica
“You can only control your own self and your own mind.” - Anonymous
6. Define your Success
For me, I define success based on the success of my 4 boys. I'm successful if I'm able to nurture and train my sons to be entrepreneurial and productive citizens of the Philippines, God-fearing, and proud to be Filipino.
“Redefine success in terms of how you can best serve others. Because that is one success that lasts.” - Ramon M
“Think of others more highly than you.” - Anonymous
“Success is not measured by the position you reached but rather by the obstacles you have overcome.” - Anonymous
7. Find the Humor in your Life
I'm starting to learn not to take life too seriously and to treat setbacks with humor. Recently, my flight back to Manila with my boys was cancelled; I had a choice to either get mad or get excited by the new adventure that awaited us. I chose to laugh and let the fun begin.
“Relax, things eventually fall into place in its own time if it is meant for you. I feel like I've rushed to do everything that I sometimes didn't even enjoy the journey to get there.
I wish I had been less of a control freak and went more with the flow.” - Tina Vitas
“It's your outlook on life that counts. If you take yourself lightly and don't take yourself too seriously, pretty soon you can find the humor in our everyday lives. And sometimes it can be a lifesaver.” - Betty White
8. Save & Invest (I told you so!)
I believe that it's time to scale up income for the education of the kids, to invest more on insurance and retirement, and to always remember to save for an adventure.
“My number 1 regret is that I lost all my millions in my 40’s.” - Eifelica
“Save and invest.” - Ramon M
“Save more...invest for the future...it's not too late pa naman.” - Rima
“Invest for retirement.” - Deng
9. Travel: "Never Lose the Wonder of the Child in You"
I love traveling and seeing the world with my wife and kids. I invite you to discover the world with us and stay tuned to the OAP blog. :)
“Travel. Travel. Travel. See, experience and appreciate the beauty of your own country and the world as well Be kinder. Always be grateful. Volunteer. Give back. Pay it forward. Smile genuinely. Smile with your eyes. Never lose the wonder of the child in you. Be more prayerful.” - Chet Quimson-Cabigas
“Travel more :)” - Deng
“I should have started travelling at a younger age not in my 40's but in my 20's. wish we had Facebook back then.” - Anonymous
“Not all those who wander are lost.” - J.R.R. Tolkien
10. "Have One More Child" - Anonymous Mom
This is a controversial choice these days, with the rising cost of living and education. I personally believe in discerning and following God's Will for your family. Being in your 40's doesn't have to mean that you can no longer bring a child into the world.
For our family, we welcomed our fourth son, Baby Yugi when my wife turned 40. This has made me appreciate the miracle of life more, the responsibility that comes with it, and my duty to make this world a better place.
That's it! Can't wait to do an actual post on my own life lessons after another 10 years. :)
Live an Awesome Life,
Disclosure: Nothing to disclose. I wrote this article with my own biases, opinions, and learnings. Read Our Awesome Planet Complete Disclosure Policy here.
P.S. Please feel free to share your own advice and tips on how to live awesomely in your 40's in the comments. Thank you!